I am not having the best of times with punishment for B. Lets just say I am the bad cop in the family and I suck at it. B is testing every limit right now and is very hyperactive. We are not sure if the hyperactivity is a phase or something deeper but we will have to just play it by ear.
So far in the last week he has broken a computer, a pair of 3D glasses and a lamp. Now I know you are thinking they should really baby proof but come on a lamp on a table does not fall under we did not baby proof. He did not throw something at it or knock it over on accident he just pulled the table down. I was so stunned I just didn't even react.
He used to be a headbutter and biter but I thought we were out of that phase till the last few days. Last night I ended up with 3 bites and the kid does not just bite and move on he bites like he is eating caramel and pulls off. Oh my reaction the first time it happened was not pretty.
Yes I spanked him on his diaper, Ugh how I did not want to be that mom. And then I sat him on the chair for time out for 1 minute. He screamed and cried through the whole ordeal seemed to get it and then I explained to him in a calm voice that he can not do that it hurts people. A few hours later he did it again.
I can not seem to think that his behavior is a reflection of my parenting. I am really starting to doubt that I am any good at this or that I should be allowed to have any more children. Even my mom said she would not want a second for me at this moment because my hands are so full with B. I am trying all different things to see what works with him and well hoping we find a solution.
I wish this was a time I could blame hubby but with him at work all day I know this falls on to me 5 out of 7 days a week. I think he gets right from wrong being that last night after punishing him he followed me around till I gave him a hug and told him it was ok.
I don't know if it is normal for an almost 17 month old to climb anything he can, destroy a room in a minute flat, prefer to feed the dogs instead of himself, head butt any surface (even those that make me cringe), growl, throw things. Is this the terrible 2's?
I mean there are many times he is sweet and cuddly and so lovely but then there are times when I think he is a gremlin and we should no longer get him wet!!!
I just hope sooner than later I get some sort of sign or reassurance that I have not failed as a mother and that it is very normal for little boys to be hellions when they are toddlers and not grow up to be cereal killers!
You have not failed...you have a boy! LOL! I swear my kid entered the terrible 2 stage around 17 or 18 months also. It was like ... BOOM, my sweet little baby turned into a little dare devil. He will learn his boundaries and you will figure out the best disciplinary actions to take. Hang in there mom! :) I won't even tell you age 3 is worse...
ReplyDeleteAwe, Tara, you're not the bad guy. He's almost 2! Both of my kids started early. My youngest is only 26 months and she can definitely test me more often than not. You'll get through it. You're an awesome mom!! Not Your Ordinary Agent
ReplyDeleteNot Your Ordinary Recipes
You are not a failure, some kids can really just be harder than others. My third was a head banger and a bit of a wild guy. You might want to try some sensory work, I know it sounds funny but some kids just need some more stimulation than others. You can have fun squishing him with a pillow, letting him jump on the bed or take him to a playground or outside. Another thing that calmed both my boys down was swinging them in a sheet like a big swing. My husband and I would do this at night with our oldest when he was the same age as your pumpkin and it often worked. Also, a tub full of those ball pit balls can be great too. I also had a big storage box I filled with beans and would hide small toys in that he had to find. Each child is different, I don't know your guy but these are just some suggestions. I know how frustrating it can be. I remember with my friends and I that this age could really be challenging!! Hang in there!!! I don't know if it's still around but I loved "The girlfriends guide to Toddlers" it always made me feel better!! Also, don't be afraid to put him in the crib if he is really getting to you. Sometimes a cup of coffee, a good cry or a phone call can really help when you just want to throw the little darling!! And don't be afraid to reach out to your doctor for help too. Hang in there!!! xoxo
ReplyDeleteWow, we've just started the head butting/ smacking phase so I'll be checking up on you to see if you ever figure out how to fix this crap. My lips can't take any more beatings right now from this kid.
ReplyDeleteAnd you have definitely NOT failed as a mother. Unfortunately, I'm sure this is normal. It sucks and I know we all hope it passes quickly. Let us know if you make any progress.
My best friend decided long ago that the hardest time was between ages 1-3. You can't reason with them, they don't know how to reason themselves and you have to be on top of them 24/7. Exhausting! But temporary!! Thank goodness. And my boy is waaayyy more of challenge with active busyness than my girl, but just as much of a love. That's what I hold on to...and the fact that all the hard work is starting to pay off.
ReplyDeleteKathy has some great suggestions above. I was going to say to try to get all of the energy out of him like that, and let it release. He sounds normal though, just active and feisty. Don't beat yourself up, especially being tough on the biting, because that can cause real problems for others, and the human bite can get quite infected. You do have to crack down on that any way you can. I had a friend who was exhausted with the same problem, and she actually bit back to let him know what it felt like. That worked for her little guy, but I'm not sure if it would for everyone. It might encourage it too. You'll have to just keep trying different ways. Oh, so tough!...hang in there and good luck!
ReplyDeleteNot much more I can add to the wisdom of the others, except prayer can be a strong force for knowing what to do and also for knowing what you're doing is right and important! I endured 11 of the little darlings and I feel for you and your frustration, but they do grow up and move away!
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